The thing with Peaches is that she thinks she's so beautiful that she owns this place. Therefore, if you scold her for any of her delinquencies, she looks bored and confident, as if there's no way in hell that she could have done whatever sin she has committed---nor does she give a damn:
This look appears on her face when:
- She has bitten my strand of yarn in half;
- She has knocked over the cats' water bowl, causing me to nearly kill myself when I walk into the kitchen and step in the puddle of water--- and slip onto my ass;
- She has knocked every single one of Blaine's pens or cigarette lighters under the couch or love seat;
- She has walked across the TV stand, thus hitting a button which cuts off the beam of light between the TV and the long, sound speaker--- which turns off the sound---causing Blain and me to scratch our heads in confusion, wondering what in the hell happened to the TV's sound;
- She has rumpled up every single throw rug in the house, causing me to practically trip to my death on the raised parts of the rugs. (This greatly amuses her because when this happens I spill my cup of coffee or plate holding my grilled cheese sandwich) (I really think she wants to kill or maim me, between the spilling of the water bowl and then the rumpling of the throw rugs...);
-- She has shoved poor Leonard out of the way to eat his food after she eats hers (which I think explains her fatness);
Oh, I could go on and on. She is the stubbornest kitten I've ever had and she can outlast me on whatever scolding or consequence I place before her. I have even tried taking away a couple of chew toys but she doesn't care---because we've got about eleventeen more of them all over the place.
(Is "stubbornest" a word?);
(Is "eleventeen" a word?);
I have found cat toys in my bed (which explains my discomfort at night when I'm tossing and turning), toys in the bathroom, toys upstairs, toys downstairs, and toys on the stairs (which I think is yet another way she wants me to slip and fall to my death.) I have even taken away her favorite toy--a little goldfish--but she doesn't care. She'll then show renewed interest in the little mousie toys or birdie toys.
(Is "mousie" a word?)
Anyways, no matter how much I scold her, I hear crickets.
So what's a cat owner to do?